Friday, August 18, 2006
It is a lot of grand finery, big words, colourful display... (like birds scaling and swooping to impress potential mates.) But facades are not meant to last forever. We only do it when we are expected to be on our best behaviour.Behind that seemingly impressive grace and intellect, who exactly are we? It is what we do automatically for others, that defines the real us. It is who we are, when we think no one is watching. It is our responses when we are stressed and tired. It is our judgement of people.
Perhaps I am just an irredeemable idiot who mentally cuts to the chase.It is difficult to know what people think about you, because most of them will neither tell nor show it. Even if they would say, it is a completely different matter the extent to which one would trust them. As seen in the recent structured psychological exercise, they take themselves as the yardstick and your strengths and weaknesses are all but relative.
Do we listen? Do we try to fit in? Do we become them? It is a difficult decision we make all the time. But it is all the harder when nearly everyone around you is well assimilated and you start wondering whether are you the one who is being inflexible and anti-social. It even becomes claustrophobic. But as with the word "assimilation", we connect, but only at a risk of losing who we really are. It is important to be social, but not to the extent of merging into a single homogenous blob.
The above-mentioned; my class.
Anyway, i got a whooping 85% for my Chemistryt block test. Its a tie between me and janson. Oh thank god for this result i attained. Well, our class did better in this test compared to those previous ones. Alas, they finally woke up from their "slumberland".
That is a long side track. Life is a lot easier if we just follow the flow, going down the path of least resistance. Like a rock thrown into a stream, you either go downstream or sit there and be gradually eroded.
readinbetweenthelines.
posted by Pepsi on 6:01 PM
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Thursday, August 17, 2006
i am in a happy mood. in a mood for love. in a mood for anything... cos particularly, i think i did well in the chemistry test today, albeit there are some minor mistakes here and there.confidence level of getting an A : 85 %
well, pe was repugnant. i just cannot tolerate the aces day dance. not that i cant dance (and not that i danced well), i dont like those actions-in-sync with the song by rhianna- "SOS". tsk tsk. and and, mr hiap is so-not-understanding. i dont know. but i feels that he's kinda forcing us to do things we cant do. worse of all, he aint encouraging at all. take for example, during my retest for napfa, i cant do pullups as i didnt train. and fcukingly he said this to me, "i dont know what is WRONG with you. perhaps, you just need to find your missing will and determination." WTF?!? i dont understand. nono, i understood his meaning. DAMN SARCARSTIC CAN?! freak. okok. undeniably, i am weak. but thats not the way to BOOST the morale of YOUR students what. so, suck it!
oh. i forgot that i should be enjoying instead of bitching here.
i am feeling good. with my gp file done. my chinese corrections done. with a pass in GP test. scoring 48/50 for my chinese test. ok. my life is in place now.
thanks to you, who guided me through the dark tunnel.
i finally see some light.
somehow.
posted by Pepsi on 9:56 PM
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Wednesday, August 16, 2006
its my "self-proclaimed" break now. i think i've had enough of chemistry today. god please bless me for my chemistry test tmr.i just need an A.
JUST AN "A" WILL DO. PLEASE AND THANK YOU!
it might sound condescending and overboard for demanding an A, but do spare a thought for me. well, as i presume all of you know, i suck at physics. so, i cannot totally depend on physics to do well. and hence, i've decided to bang on chemistry instead. not that its easier but it just spur me on to study in greater details, unlike for the case of physics. yes, i am trying very very hard to accomodate physics into my life, but it seems like i am getting nowhere near there.
this aside. school today was pretty monotonous. i hate to say this but you know, i just feel that pjc students really really should/must/oughtto let their hair down, sometimes. i know promos/alevels are coming up but hey, thats not the definite way of doing well you see. as i was thinking to myself a few hours ago, i think we should maintain a healthy lifestyle of consisting of work and play. i dont know. it depends on the way you perceive things to be. yeah.
alright. 5 more mins. i got to go recap on all the things i've studied for chem today.
do pray for me too.
my precious "A"....
posted by Pepsi on 9:50 PM
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Tuesday, August 15, 2006
at last, i cleared my physics+chinese+GP tests today. though i think i much pretty screwed up my econs test yesterday plus GP test plus physics test today, its not against my conscience as i really did study for those tests please. there's something really OMFG going wrong with me because i am drifting in and out and in and out of my wonderland.and and, i am going crazy over this jasmine+suezanne+wener+jane clique. they are oh-so-lovable alright? sigh. if only.. if only i was THAT LUCKY, like engkien, who happen to meet his S09 CRUSH EVERYWHERE HE GOES. tsk tsk. and he's totally gone haywire just because of that S09 BRACED-SMILE girl. hahah!!!
replies to taggies.
janice- lets MUG hard, TRAIN hard, PLAY hard together. and yeah. there's this member of mine in my pw group who seems to be like THAT girl in your group as well. so EEWWW can. and i cant stand her no more. she's apparently going to climb up my head and pluck out all my hair if i didnt tell her to stop acting as if THE WORLD REVOLVES ONLY AROUND HER. catch up soon. and sorry for not picking up the phone yesterday. SORRY X 10000. i was asleep by then and my ringtone is !#!@$#@!%$#!%$^%$ soft. hAHA!
elizabeth- you hot lad! i miss your voice can!!!!!!!! and do ask qinpei+andrea+shiya+others who are taking their o's this year to study hard as well. then after that, we'll go to the beach and enjoy the oll' good humdrum days of our lives. =)))))) miss you!
and to that bitter sweet (sry, you didnt tag but i just want you to know something) something that goes like this: you suck. thats it. thanks for listening, sucker. HAHA(EVIL GRINS)
i got to go catch up on my oscillation tutorial.
-yearningtoseehertmr-
posted by Pepsi on 8:32 PM
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Sunday, August 13, 2006
how i wish.pretty bad weekend to start with. because firstly, it wasnt, or perhaps, isnt productive at all as i slacked the whole of saturday and 3/4 of sunday. woots. secondly, its been a pain in the ass to stay home and memorise alkanes and motion in a circle notes instead of catching the finale of the firework festival. BOO~ thumbs down for this. so disappointed. but if staying at home can gurantee me an A in both my physics and chemistry tests next week, i wouldnt mind at all. BUT, i dont think so. just look at how misplaced i am right now. tsk.
been running around my neighbourhood to pump up my stamina for the upcoming safra half marathon. and, its disgusting i tell you. fancy running around your neighborhood for a month. the fimilar scenery, the sights and sounds.. omg- i can even tell you in exactly how many steps you run can you reach bukit panjang plaza from my house. ughhh. -shakehead-
i got to start my revision now. anyway, if you are keen to know what my block tests time table is like, here's a break down for it:
monday- Econs test (6pm - 7 pm)
tuesday- Chinese Essay test (9 am - 1030 am)
- GP Essay test (11 am -1230 pm )
- Physics test ( 6 pm - 7 pm )
wednesday- free
thursday- Chemistry test ( 6 pm - 7 pm )
friday- free
and not to mention, my napfa re-test. i got a bronze already WHAT. still need to freakingly retest; as if i have nothing better to do. get a life, man.
COUGH COUGH -AHEM- !!!
posted by Pepsi on 5:39 PM
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