Friday, April 21, 2006
Inertia, inertia. Situation is desperate and am feeling slightly hopeless and ragged about the edges: really am starting to not enjoy any of this and I just want to sleep on the grass all day instead of picking up anything and everything.today: ostracised-outcasted-goodwood park hotel-tiramisu-shoes lost-rubbish bin-substitute-co-fingering-late-jane-evelyn-library-spoke to me-speak to her-pointing finger in the air-night jaunt-not me....
I procrastinate so much nowadays, to the point of incompletion. Room, physical appearance, fitness and finances are in as tragic a mess but I feel the lassitude settling into presentness; can just about summon the effort to go draw the next few (mediocrely done) assignments before sinking back into the rut of antisocial passivity and being happy enough just to blame myself and talk about change. Being sick is just an excuse.
it completely cracked me up; if I have to explain why then we probably can't be friends!
posted by Pepsi on 8:34 PM
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Wednesday, April 19, 2006
My day ended with an A2 in maths test and utter disappointment. But I guess it's alright and I should be thanking my lucky stars that at least I got a distinction. I ought to learn to feel satisfied just for once in my life, damn it.The TSUNAMI of tests isn't much of a tsunami anymore. Soon tests will become a part of daily life. So dreary. : And splitting headaches are more of a hindrance than a help. i am unable to study properly even at home. I need some getting used to, or even better, some serious good rest.
THANK GOD for friends. Or I would have long collapsed. My family don't really understand what I need. They think I need medication and Brands essence chicken. How horrifically shallow. Nevertheless, I know they care. Just that, not in the way I expect them to.
All will be over in just a little while. Just that little while. Looking forward to the weekends. :) It certainly feels good to have something to smile about, finally.
posted by Pepsi on 7:49 PM
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Tuesday, April 18, 2006
funnily enough, i passed my chem test. and i got a B4!! omg. i thought i would fail, but it turn out to be the otherwise. WOOOOHOOOO!! school's pretty fine. and today, we have our, or my, most-prone-to-fail subject test, physics. oh gosh.oh yeah, speaking about our PW groupings, i think i shant complain more about it as its simply just-too-perfect. HAHA- except the fact that there's one guy whom we, loathe? uhm. nono. shall we say, not too close to? yeah, that fits in perfectly.
i was having a conversation with anli and it goes like this. "... u must be sentient-beings .... young man,u had better have ur lang polish up. there shud b no excuses tht u r losing ur mind over mere, trivial matters such as these words.......care to enlighten me, or pls do..... i think u hve a paranoid syndrome.....mayb u shud reverse n change rebutting tactics.. ur infamous, notorious arrogant look...something u can't pull off.hahhaha... u look like the good kid on the blk, seriously.. my frens all think u r a mugger, which is quite true " (by the way, the ....... means there's still somethings in between)
oh- oH! alright then, i shall stop blogging here and brush up on my english. okayy, some acsian said i got the mugger look. so, as i am thinking to myself, do i look like some rafflesian then? HAHAHA . =)
posted by Pepsi on 9:00 PM
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Sunday, April 16, 2006
the BK daily.
its been a long week. lessons, lectures, tests, debating comp, catching up with frens, mardi gras, waking up at ungodly hours of the morning and sleeping at ungodly hours in the night, eating some junk food for dinner when i actually remember to eat dinner, anf the list goes on. mainly, i am just so so so glad that easter weekend is here, because then i dont have to do anything besides being my usual slothy self.
yesterdays easter encounter was vaguely fun even though i didnt speak much to tL and guys because the whole hall was so quiet- except for when its time for us to clap, we clap. (sounded so robotic. but its kind of true.) met lots of fimilar faces like VANESSA!!, EDWIN!! and blah blah blah. not to mention met some new ones too, and this again reaffirmed the fact that the world is indeed very very very small.
got to switch back to mugging mode once more. i just cant get used to this life- frankly speaking. but still, for my dream, i will work towards it. slowly, bit by bit. i can, if i believe.
posted by Pepsi on 7:05 PM
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